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Letters with S.C.
Dear SC, In your last four notes, you expressed some very essential questions about spiritual process. I'll make brief comments on each one below.... I feel sure that total acceptance of what Is is not up to me. Is grace necessary? It appears the I Am is in total contradiction to complete acceptance. Words at this point seem inadequate in expressing the struggle. What to do ? what to do? I suggest that acceptance of What Is IS up to you because no Other can do it for you. And, yes, grace is also necessary. Grace is the gift of the awakened teacher who can love you into your own self acceptance. The "I Am" is not actually in contradiction to complete acceptance. That is an appearance based on the feeling of a contradiction, which itself is based in the paradox of Being which is simultaneously Absolute and Relative. "\What do do" is to relax out of all willful doing into the feeling of that paradox, and to notice that the feeling of irresolvable paradox is YOU. But such non-doing is not the work of the separate soul, from the platform of mind-based will. Only when that will has begun to endure its own inevitable Rotting away through the realization of the Futility of Experience, can the whole Being begin its final journey into Onlyness and fundamental non-separation. I agree that the pain is. My opinion of that creates suffering. How does one change ones perspective of stimulus? Knowing perception is partially based in habit? Habit is a by-product of the whole? I don't understand all of this. But I can say that suffering (in the sense of "unnecessary" pain born of resistance to What Is) is not caused by our conditioned perception, but by our resistance to the fact of being a conditioned, limited, and mortal incarnation of Being. You can relax into the fact of being incarnate and conditioned; that is not the cause of your suffering. Being at odds with what is, surely is the foundation of suffering. Knowing that doesn't seem to help. I am in all likelihood looking for something that does not exist. Yes, you probably are looking for something that doesn't exist, such as a perfect peace that will eliminate all pain and unhappiness. But I suggest that "being at odds with What Is" is not the bottom; being at odds is the RESULT of not yet being willing and able to simply feel the simultaneous Infinite Wellness and Finite Discomfort of What Is. I invite you to catch my drift by deeply contemplating what I have written. If you are open to the transmission, you may drop through the trapdoor and into your own rapid awakening process. Love, Ted
Dear SC, Here are replies to your points..... Ted Thanks again for the response. I do believe we are discussing the root or essential dilemma. When you say, acceptance of what is, is up to me, it would seem contradictory to what is for me in this moment. It would seem any conscious effort on my part, would be corrupted, due to the fact that who I take myself to be, is the very barrier. I'd like to suggest that who you take yourself to be is NOT a barrier. We have found approaches that cut through that appearance. I will say my inquiring thoughts over time have become narrower, I seem to more quickly, come back to this essential point. Let me expand on a thought for your clarification: It seems that this(my) perspective and action thereof is a result of all things. But, complete acceptance does not seem to come about through this understanding. Which from this perspective, is, in this moment. I must say, that I realize some need for you to understand me, I guess so that you may help, if possible, to unravel, this holding on ! You say relax into the paradox. Sounds great ! But who is to relax? Good question. Actually, it's ALL of you. But that process requires both Rot and transmission. When I am the paradox! When that who wants to relax is the very block from doing just that. From my perspective, I believe that ALL of you wants to relax into being here and that PARTS of you are in the habit of thinking you are resisting. But the apparent resistance is not actually blocking out Being. Nothing can do that, since you are already being Being. This is when words fall short. You say grace is also necessary, grace comes in the form of an enlightened teacher, I assume you mean another aspect of myself. No, I do mean an awakened teacher. Thank you, for giving me your attention. SC After reading again what you said, I believe you are right, what I missed was the relax from all willful doing, not doing, but willful doing. what is will ? What I mean by "will" is the initiator of actions from the platform of mind. The paradox? It seems beyond me! I assume that's the point. Can you see my dilemma ?You are right, I do seem to label the feeling of contradiction, as pain, and that does become my experience, this is clear. Relaxing into the feeling of the paradox, seems a paradox in itself. I seem to always come back to the fact, that there is no solution. Which seems unacceptable, not by choice. This must be very frustrating to you, to be very clear in "that" and yet to see my confusion. I am the paradox. It often seems life is all about endurance. I do also realize the futility in experience or what seems to me, often times a distraction. "To stand naked in the winds and rains of life" There is no solution or resolution to the paradox. The paradox just IS. So do your best to simply feel it. Simply feel it as best you can. Give yourself a green light to be the paradox, along with all of your conditioning. None of it is a problem in terms of realization. Sincerely, SC
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